Not Dutch, Not Curaçaoan

Who am I? What am I?
I prefer to be Lydienne. Just Lydienne. 
Don't ask me who Lydienne is or what she stands for.
These questions are turning dreams, into a nightmares.
They are playing with my emotional state,
but never turns into depression.
They keeps me busy, but don’t bother me.
They help me to shape Lydienne.